The dedication takes a life time, but the dreams only last for the night

Winter winter winter. Its freezing, my nose is runny, and the sun is going down at 5. Weird. Its Thanksgiving on Thursday! Weird as can be that it's here already. But I am excited to see my loves again! Christmas is around the corner, and I'm really behind on everything. Boo boo! :[ oh well, I can pick up my slack. And I am currently in LOVE with the boys from ATL <3. Watch "Dear Maria Count Me In" and you'll see what I mean :)



XO's

My Winter To-Do List!

MY WINTER TO-DO LIST ! :D



I plan on having one hell of a winter break! Especially since school doesn't start for a while and I have the time and the leisure to do as I please again. So since that's the case, I plan to have an absolutely wonderful winter.
Here goes the plans...


-Ice Skating
-Bowling
-Christmas with my family & loves
-Disneyland when everyone comes home
-Snowboarding with the group
-San Fran/Oakland to see Karli
-Candy Cane Lane
-Christmas parties!
-Dressing up
-DABs fancy dinner
-DABs nights
-Sleeping in
-The Starbucks Seasonal menu! I love the Christmas drinks
-Making lots and lots of $$$
-Holiday Shopping
-Thanksgiving
-Foooooooooood comas
-Camping
-Meteor showers
-Star gazing
-New Years extravaganza!





I'm in love with the winter season!


XO's

Autumn brings in the new

OH MY FUCKING GOD. The September Issue looks amaaaaaazing<3. Anna Wintour is one amazing woman. I love love that woman! She is the goddess of fashion, she is the most influential woman in the industry! I love her <3 so much!!


Anyways, its already almost Thanksgiving!! Yay for food and for family and friends. Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays because it combines food & shopping. What else could be better?!? Nothing, well minus Christmas just because I love all the Christmas spirit in the air and all! And when Thanksgiving & Christmas comes around, that means all my friends that left for college are coming home! I can finally see them again! I'm pretty excited to see everyone when they're home! Love love love all around.


This may be off topic, but Krystle ( my best friend ) and I had a conversation about band boys, and the lead singer from The Starting Line looked SO cute in the "Best of Me" video, then he grew a fro and looked weird. Also from ATL Alex and Jack won me over, but Zach, the guitarist, looked SO SO SO cute in the "Poppin' Champagne" video! Also in the "Six Feet Under the Stars" video! So adorable<3 Just toss your current fro and you'll be a cutie.(:

I'm done with my rant for the night. I need to sleep, been up since 9 and got 5 hrs of sleep today. I will most definitely sleep til 3 tomorrow :) Good night loves



xoxo<3

The Heart of The Matter

Everything that we do is magical. We're all important and sometimes I forget that. Lately I haven't been doing too well. Like I'm grateful for my health and well being, but not for the inconspicuous drama in my life. And all of the heartache I've been getting. I know broken hearts mend over time, but I can't help but to wonder how long, and when will I be happy again? I've been having a hard time grasping onto that idea. The idea that once again I'm on my own, and alone. Vulnerable to the world, scared of what to do with myself, and not knowing what direction to take. It also doesn't help when I feel like nobody wants me around them. Especially at home for now. Its dark energy that I can't be around for now. Its too hard. But I won't go into deep detail about that.

Yes I did fuck up my relationship, and most of the blame can go onto me. But I will say that I loved him with my heart, and now since its over, its over and I can't fix it ever. I also hope that he can find someone better than myself, because I don't deserve a guy like him. I will be able to move on though and I'll be able to learn from this experience.

Shit Shows and Candy Whores.

Oh fuck halloween was so ridiculous. Two days straight of binge drinking? I think my liver hates me. But oh my god, San Diego showed us all some lovin'. But back to behaving and going M.I.A to go to work and school. That will be my life probably from now on! Hehe.

Ok so here's what went down on Friday night. I got to SD at 5:30, hung out with Jake and his roomies + Richie and we went to eat. Went to get ready, waited for Kari and Krystle to get to SD, then went to Riki's ( where I got trashed ) and we lost my car some how that night. Linda, Koichi, Crystal, and I went looking for it and couldn't find it. Then I send my boyfriend and Richie to go look for it and they find it. Went back to La Jolla and KOed for the night. Alcohol won me over.

Saturday ( Halloween ) Slept til 2, and Jake and I met up with Richie to get free burritos from Chipotle! YES! FTW. Went make up shopping and bought M.A.C's 227 brush, their lipgelee in Gold something, and a new eyeliner. After we picked up Dynise then Krys and Kari at Rikis' house. I got ready, went back to Riki's to drop the car off, then walked 29130213098231098 miles because our asses didn't want to get caught with our booze! hahaha. Then we made it to Myles and had so much fun! <3 Went home at 2 and Jake got sick.

Sunday came home and worked :( boo boo boo!

but here's some pictures as well.